Sunday, March 26, 2006 ++

somebody pls make me stop thinking.
too much thoughts flashing through.
12:37 AM

Tuesday, March 21, 2006 ++

this is life.
its a reality.
a reality of different pple with different personality.
some pple just cant work with the rest.
they only wants it their way.
why cant everybody stay harmoniously together?
discuss everything in a proper manner?
give each other some basic respect and courtesy.

well. i can really see the difference btw 2 society.
one is heaven.
the other is hell.
but they are still reality in this world.
so why cant everybody be the same?
boohoo!
9:24 PM

Monday, March 20, 2006 ++

im dead
im dead
im so so so dead.
everything is popping up into me.
moodswings are everywhere.
jus becos whatever thing that pops into have different mood.

err.....
so i shall start with my schoolwork.
actually not much lah.
just that i dun wan whoever that is worry abt my grades to be worry.
i guess i would be able to plan my time.
i really HAVE to plan my time alr.
i cannot afford to wonder off and do other things anymore.
sad life i know.
quite sad. haha.
yes yes study comes first.
i know. i know.
but if i really have this ''passion'' of other commitments.
i have to do it too.
whether its for my own interest or because of my responsibility.
i have to do it.

my mum has been seriously nagging me abt my studies.
my time. (the amt i rest & im always home late)
she kept saying my face yellow yellow. haha.
my personal commitments.
but i tell u.
my mummy is the greatest person!
she just wash strawberries and grapes for me.
cos she said i must eat more fruits.
so rather than keep eating apple.
she bought something more appetizing.
so nice right? haha.
and she always make sure i drink her soup every dinner.
my mum can cook the best soup ever.
u prefer light flavour or heavy flavour,
she also can cook.
try her vegeterian shark fin soup.
i can tell u.
its the B.E.S.T! =D
got pple wanna buy her for recipe ok.
dun play play. hahahha.

today. i hold back my tears many many times.
i told someone not to cry.
and braved it through.
cos thats the only thing we can do.
sometimes as i think abt it.
i know im scared.
i really am.
but i cannot afford to stay at one corner to hide.
because by doing so, i actually kick the rest to hell
and i'll be living in a ''peaceful'' place where no one can disturb.
i dun call it a heaven.
because for somebody who does such irresponsible act.
that person does not deserved to be in heaven.
ok whatever i am saying. haha.
im scared.
im scared of the consequences.
im scared of letting pple down.
im scared of failure.
im scared of parents.
im scared that some girls might not be able to take it.
im scared of ms quek and ms chua.
i really wished to be in somewhere without them.
im afraid of seeing them.
im afraid of hearing from them.
im afraid of seeing sms-es from them.
im afraid to receive calls from them.
finally im im saying how frightened i am.
i keep reminding myself to stay strong. stay strong.
but as i go along.
things are getting more and more out of hand.
i can no longer say anything or do anything.
i feel weaker and weaker.
everything seems to be in a mess.
and now im afraid.....
that this little needle might break anytime.

at other side of my life,
im scared to request to go somewhere.
im scared to request to do something.
im scared to make her sad and worry.
im trying as much as i can to obey.
and i hope she understands.
she's nice. yes she is.
perhaps she's just over protective.
its just because of love.
sometimes as she talks to me abt this very sensitive topic,
i really not want her to compare so much of it.
perhaps she thinks its alright.
but it isn't. i wanna correct u.
i hope u listen. but u doesn't seems to.
it hurts.
i dun wan u to create such a sin unknowingly,
just becos of this little ignorant part of you.
it might look as little as nth.
but the fact is, its a big thing. the worst thing u can compare and critisised abt.
u're not wrong. maybe its just the way u feel as u compare.
but pls. stop.
listen to what others has got to say.
dun reply things like ''ya ya. u're good at talking''
telling u it, does not mean its protective against that organisation.
but the truth is it.
u have to understand it after so many years of following.
if not there's really no point staying so long for.
for me, i've seen what is it.
i know what is it.
i've learn lots from it.
im feeling comfortable with it.
everything and anything she does is all out of her compassion.
u really have to understand and not just see its outer.

frankly. i really wanna shou wu jie.
i wanna go taiwan chao sheng.
i'll make it a wish.
a wish that can come true anytime soon........
8:39 PM

Saturday, March 18, 2006 ++

life still goes on.
never stop hoping.
perservere.
we all know this is your darkest period.
its terrible.
but would u rather be depress than being happy?
i mean of cos its normal to be depress.
but whether u are happy or sad,
time still pass.
u still have to face it.
life still goes on.
i would rather live it happily than to stay gloomy.
think abt ur parents, your friends.
they are your support.
it hurts to see u like that.
esp your parents.
think abt their effort to help u.
u cant possibly just shatter off like that.

since everything is still not confirm.
keep trying. keep hoping. keep praying.
remember what i told u before?
your mood and mental state affects your condition the MOST.
stay positive. everything would be positive naturally.
cheer up girl!
we'll be here 24/7 for you. =)
3:38 PM

++

SYF . NDP

i wonder whats wrong with the sec2s lah.
all are so afriad to go into syf or ndp marching contigent.
their seniors here are so eager to go.
they dont even have this basic passion for guides.
arg.
it has never come across them on how to bring up bwgg unit.
how how how how how.
i've got no idea what to do with them.
they are so afraid of toughness.
they joined guides becos they thought that its the slackest cca ever.
but too bad. they are absolutely wrong.
we can never afford to slack anymore.

sec 3s.
half half.
one super strong.
another one super slack.
HOW THE HACK DO THEY DARE NOT TO TURN UP FOR TODAY'S NDP SELECTION.
god!
they're like hopeless.
no point scolding.
no point punishing.
i really have to find another way out to deal with them.
i shall try to talk to ms chua first.
but for what i predict,
she's going to get me to think of a solution myself again.
ask like never ask like that.
so dumb.
hahhaa.
i hope those pple who did not attend the ndp selection today will not turn out to be like b**v*n*.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
the stronger ones are doing well.
slowly they are adapting and taking over.
they would be given all the authorities once we step down.
they're not going to follow our footsteps. =)
3:19 PM

++

MILLION LOTUS FOLDING SESSIONS

Volunteer to fold as many lotuses as you can.
Every lotus represents an aspiration of compassion - compassion that is so-needed to achieve inter-religious harmony.
Singaporeans of all religions and races are joining in to fold 1 million lotuses, symbolizing the infinite power of compassion that we can generate towards a more peaceful world!

WHO can participate?
Anyone! Children, students, youths, adults, housewives, retirees, senior citizens all can!

WHERE?
KMSPKS Ven Hong Choon Memorial Hall Level 1

WHEN does it start?
Every Friday, Saturday and Sunday afternoons starting 10th March 2006.
2pm to 6pm


HOW? (If I don't know how to fold a paper lotus, can I volunteer?)
Lotus Coaches will be showing you how to fold a lotus, no worries!


Thousands of people in Singapore will be engaged in this ground breaking, mind-bogging movement to produce 1,ooo,ooo origami paper lotuses!

How else can you help?
*You can also pledge a certain number of lotuses and do it at home!
*You can invite your boss, colleagues, friends and relatives to fold or pledge!
*Donate your unwanted magazines, printing paper to us! Give your unwanted paper a new lease of life! Every paper is a lotus of compassion!
(However, old newspaper and paper beyond recycling condition will be donated to recycling kiosk)
*Sign up as a volunteer during 6 to 7 May 2006 (vesak @ orchard)

hahahaha.
whoever interested ple tell me.
we can go together.
im trying to find as many pple to help as possible. =)

As we fold each lotus,
Develop thoughts of loving kindness and compassion for all.
Every lotus will bloom beautifully

"Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive."

3:06 PM

Friday, March 17, 2006 ++

i dun wanna go to school.
i dun wanna do holiday assignments.
i feel so lazy.
haha.
1:22 PM

Thursday, March 16, 2006 ++

life is so hectic everyday.
what i can do is just to to follow.
time FLIES.
only left with 3 days of holidays.
can u imagine?
i haven done anything much yet.
sp rover's campfire's performance is still on its way.
and next sat is the campfire alr.
irresponsible pple just dun come for meeting.
everybody is sick.
HOW CONTAGIOUS.
but who cares.
this pple are going to produce an MC.
if not i'll see what i can do to scare them.
idiots.

my hair is so so so short now.
look like boy boy.
i cant tuck my hair behind my ear.
my ears seems to enlarged.
hurr.. i wan my hair back.
its too short!
all my fault lah.
call the aunty cut shorter. LOL.
but i didn;t know she'll ct it this short.
alsagoff is going to love me alot.
but i dun want her to love me.
hurrr.....

somebody pls grow up.
u and i are different.
different mentality.
different style.
different personality.
try the little ones.
they might be the one.
yes i am talking abt u.
dun need to ask my friends alr.
11:59 PM

Sunday, March 12, 2006 ++

terrible terrible terrible
nothing just terrible.
really terrible.
12:26 AM

Friday, March 10, 2006 ++

A.T.T.I.T.U.D.E
the right attitude is not just to work hard alone.
it is to do it without complains.
dont keep on telling yourself u're tired.
neither do u kept on telling urself you need a break.
it'll just make you more reluctant.
for even more.
once u accept the task, do it.
whole heartedly.
your limits are unlimited.
never think how limited u and your resources are.
there is always a way out.
but rather than going the super easy way out and make everything so...
not like it was suppose to be.
THINK!
do your best.
impressed people.
that's the reason why we're holding such an event.

sometimes its just simply because we're too friend.
u dont take me for who i am anymore.
always note on your usage of words.
im especially particular abt the ways u present to me.
not forgetting, i can easily see through.....
your attitude.
8:02 PM

Wednesday, March 08, 2006 ++

oops. i read your organiser.
hahaha. i'll say
''sorry'' if u're talking abt me.
''dun be sad'' if u're not talking abt me.
nobody will ever take this as a joke dont worry.
cos its a BIG thing.
your parents are those who are most worried abt u.
no doubt about it.
so. the big day is tomorrow.
just go in bravely.
and come out safely.
we'll be waiting for your great news!
=)

whats next.
it has been some time since i've talk abt guides.
ok. lets talk abt the last friday meeting.
everything was fine. fun. funny.
until ms quek came.
after that comes ms chua.
woohoo!
ms quek is ok. cos she's always unreasonable.
it was ms chua!
be frank. ms chua is nice.
just that she always do things holding the word responsibility with her.
its perfectly fine. she can be sarcastic.
with her BIG round eyes staring at you. expecting u to answer all her questions.
smartly.
not an easy task ok.
so what happen was. we were doing footdrill.
and those kuku kept dragging their feets.
with their kuku arms slacking.
and their kuku body that cant coordinate with the rest.
how kuku can they get?
kuku heads.
LOL.ok enough of scolding.
eventually i made them took off their shoes to keep thier feel shut.
and put a 12 inch pole on their arm to make sure its 90 degree.

a CUTE BONG BONG who ''felt for them''
and went to complain to the teacher whose ms chua.
without even telling us that she ''felt for them''
and discuss with us first.
so this bong bong got ms chua down.
not to say that we're in the wrong for inplimenting such punishment. i dun see anything wrong.
they deserve it since they dont learn.
this pple should know themself what they are in for the moment they join guides.
it is suppose to be a uniform grp with strict discipline.
doesn't means those previous mdms are slack. so we'll continue slacking.
somebody will have to wake up and fix this whole situation as well as to wake the rest up.
the reason why i make u girls wear back your shoes is because i dun wanna create more trouble cos i heard trouble is coming on its way alr.
the trouble was not cause by me. neither the other sec 4s training them.
it was somebody who got nth better to do becos she doesn't wanna do anything. and only know how to ''feel for pple''.
that person is a hypocrite.
he should feel guily.
when i just started to have trust in her all over again.
he betrayed it.
saddening huh.
does this means never to trust pple who ever betray it over and over again?
ok lor. hahahahha.
actually this kind of pple also dun need to bother too much.
its a waste of time. since she only know how to ''feel for them''
SO PAINFUL...! AWWW.....
AHAHAHAHAHAHAA.

and many pple cried on friday too.
all becos of teachers lah.
one day if ms quek can stop scolding me, blaming me, accusing me,
i'll be the happiest person ever on earth.
i wonder what hack did i own her my previous life.
hahaha. she's always so irritating.
first time she say im rebellious.
secong time she says im irresponsible.
then she say im blur. (i wonder who is the blur one)
now she says im a liar.
sometimes effort just dont pay off.
i dun expect anything from the teachers.
just hope that whatever activities we're holding on goes smoothly.
no need for praises.
needless to say
i dun expect to always get scoldings too.
ok lah its normal to get tell off.
but not this kind like what i got from ms quek.
she can drive me mad. totally mad.
she doesn't understands.
always going her way.
can she ever stop and listen to what other pple has got to say?

aiya actually i bring up this friday thing because ms chua wants to talk to me about it again TOMORROW!
i thought it was over already lor.
but it seems to be endless.
i can predict.
its going to be a bad day tmr again.
boohoo!
5:02 PM

++

hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhaaa.
so sad for u. have to work on your bday.
quick! cursed the itp.
for your information. i reached home very early recently.
its just 4.30pm now. and i'll be taking a nap again.
while u are having your FUN working.
aww. how sad.
so stupid lah. i sholudn't have even told u that i forgot ur bday.
den i can make it as if i purposely dun say till the end of the day.
so dumb lor.
chey so not fun anymore.
hahahha.
hey. marine expert cum factory aunty.
i've got a very nice idea for u to thank me for the present.
saying thankyou alone is not enough.
BRING ME TO YOUR FIRST FEW DENTAL APPOINTMENT.
it'll be enough. *GRIN*
come on. say yes lah idiot. its not difficult lor.
so faster get your butt down and fixed your braces on as soon as possible.
so that i can have some fun.
whee~~
4:40 PM

Tuesday, March 07, 2006 ++

im so lazy to blog. but just to give it a little live.
so what?
my CA results are disgusting.
can i not take the report slip to show my parents not?
so disgusting lah.
there goes all the nags and scoldings again.
haiyo.
i failed the bloody chinese lah!
how can that ever happen to me?
so saddening lor.
i failed my chinese?
like what the hell. chinese?!
how to improve?
aiya im like so dead. kill me man.
9:05 PM

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